kristin has been a bad kristin
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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