if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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