ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize