Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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