I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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