im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize