Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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