he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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