when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
