I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
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