Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
We just shotgunned beers for America
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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