Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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