yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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