Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
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i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
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That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??