from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Randomize
