Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
