If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
