what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
Randomize