left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Randomize
