some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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