Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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