remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
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