At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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