I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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