Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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