No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
