I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
