Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
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