I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
