Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Randomize