WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize