It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
this hospital has no fireball
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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