So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
