This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
