Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I still have a little drunk in my system
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
