So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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