Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
You did what with his pubic hair?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
