the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Randomize
