Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
