Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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