Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize