I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
