Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
