a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
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