I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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