yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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