Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Randomize
