Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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