I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Randomize
