Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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